. . . and that's How the Fight Started . .
.
One year, a husband decided to buy his mother-in-law a
Cemetery plot as
a Christmas
gift.
The next year,
he didn't buy
her a gift.
When she asked
him why, he
replied,
"Well, you still haven't used the gift
I bought you
last year!"
And that's how
the fight
started.
-------------------------------------------
My wife walked
into the den &
asked "What's on
the TV?"
I replied "Dust"
And that's how
the fight
started.
-------------------------------------------
A woman is
standing nude,
looking in the
bedroom mirror.
She is not happy
with what she
sees and says to
her husband,
I feel horrible; I look old, fat and
ugly. I really
need you to pay
me a compliment.
The husband
replies, 'Your
eyesight's damn
near perfect.'
And that's how
the fight
started.
-------------------------------------------
My wife was
hinting about
what she wanted
for our upcoming
anniversary.
She said, 'I
want something
shiny that goes
from 0 to 200 in
about 3 seconds.
I bought her a
scale.
And that's how
the fight
started.
-------------------------------------------
I asked my wife,
'Where do you
want to go for
our
anniversary?'
It warmed my
heart to see her
face melt in
sweet
appreciation.
'Somewhere I
haven't been in
a long time!'
she said.
So I suggested,
'How about the
kitchen?'
And that's how
the fight
started.
-------------------------------------------
My wife and I
are watching Who
Wants To Be A
Millionaire
while we were in
bed.
I turned to her
and said, 'Do
you want to have
sex?'
'No,' she
answered.
I then said, 'Is
that your final
answer?'
She didn't even
look at me this
time, simply
saying 'Yes.'
So I said, 'Then
I'd like to
phone a friend.'
And that's how
the fight
started.
-------------------------------------------
I tried to talk
my wife into
buying a case of
Miller Light for
$14.95. Instead,
she bought a jar
of cold cream
for $7.95.
I told her the beer would make her look better at night
than the cold
cream.
And that's how
the fight
started.
-------------------------------------------
I took my wife
to a restaurant.
The waiter, for
some reason,
took my order
first.
'I'll have the
strip steak,
medium rare,
please.'
He said, 'Aren't
you worried
about the mad
cow?'
'Nah, she can
order for
herself.'
And that's how
the fight
started
